5 weeks 5 days

*** Take note that I opted to follow the buccal approach para just in case kailangan ko magpa-ospital, walang madedetect na gamot sa vaginal canal. As much as possible, sundin parin ang instructions ni Ms Ella and do your own research na rin.

October 10 - positive pregnancy test. Based on my LMP, I was on my 5th week. It took a few days to decide if itutuloy ko ba or hindi.

October 14 - took another PT, positive ulit. I decided not to continue this pregnancy and ordered from Ms. Ella. Sent payment.

October 16 - received the tracking #
October 17 - picked up the package from LBC

Day 1 - October 19
Ate normally the whole day, plus some snacks.
A few hours before taking Mife, I reduced liquid intake. At exactly 7PM, I took Mife with several gulps of water para hindi ko masuka.
Around 9.30pm, I had dinner. No symptoms nor adverse reaction for the rest of the night.

Day 2 - October 20
Woke up with a dull ache in my stomach that lasted the whole day. Felt constantly sleepy, tired and fatigued. I noticed that my boobs felt less tender than the past few days. Had light breakfast lang kasi my stomach felt queasy. I ate light snacks lang din para may laman ang tyan. Sometimes I'd feel very light cramping, yung feeling na parang magkakaperiod.
At around 5PM, I had some white discharge which looks normal discharge naman. I wore napkin na just to be sure.
Around 7PM, I had light dinner with little liquid intake.
At 8.40PM, I took 4 Miso via buccal approach, 2 tablets between cheeks and gums on each side then kept it tucked there for around 40mins until it naturally dissolved. I swallowed the rest of the remaining pieces without water.
10PM, felt slight cramps and some chills. Bleeding started. 10.15PM, first toilet visit. I passed the sac and a couple of clots but I wasn't brave enough to take a closer look to confirm. Cramps followed, I'd say 5/10 pain. More chills.
In some spiritual way that perhaps only mothers could feel, I knew my little angel is gone.

Day 3 - October 21
I fell asleep and woke up around 1.15AM. Nag CR ulit, more clots lumabas. Medyo kinabahan ako kasi maraming lumabas. Cramps intensified to 7/10.
Nakatulog ako ulit.
6.10AM na ko nagising ulit. Took a sip of water, nag CR ulit, nafeel ko yung hilo. Wala na masyadong cramps, but more clots lumabas ulit. I changed my pad. Hindi naman puno yung pad, kasi lumalabas lang yung blood when I sit on the toilet.
Medyo nahihilo ako, so I opted to rest rather than exercise. I also needed the rest, emotionally.
I had champorado for breakfast and some milk. Did some chores. Blood flow was minimal. The rest of the day, I mostly rested kasi pinapakiramdaman ko rin yung hilo. If pinilit kong mag heavy activity, baka tumumba ako. Pakiramdaman nyo what your body needs.

Day 4 - October 22
Moderate bleeding throughout the day. I had a very quick warm shower and shampooed my hair separately na din. I know sabi sa instructions bawal maligo to prevent infections, but di ko talaga natiis and felt mas magkakasakit ako if hindi ako maligo.
I noticed that I no longer have food cravings, and almost no breast tenderness na rin. Did some house chores.

Day 5 - October 23
Bleeding is moderate but heavier than the day before. I felt a little weak and just rested most of the day.

Day 6 - October 24
Bleeding is still moderate but no more big clots. May konting hilo, and headache in the evening.

Day 7 & 8 - October 25 & 26
Light bleeding throughout the day.

Day 9 - October 27
Very little bleeding to none.
Brown to light brown discharge na lang. Felt very bloated and hot flushes, might be hormonal.
Constipated and walang gana kumain.

Day 12 - October 31
No more bleeding. Back to normal daily activities. Hindi na nahihilo, no more food cravings, not bloated na rin.

Day 15 - November 3
Pregnancy test result is Negative.

Total days ng bleeding: 11 days

This was a very half hearted decision.
I'm in my late 30's and we have only 1 child. My husband never knew I was pregnant. He suspected it but I assured him it was only delayed period and he believed me.
I hate myself for doing this.
Before taking Mife on Day 1, I cried and asked myself 1000x over if this is what I wanted. I realized I wanted to have the baby and give our son a sibling but the financial impact will cripple the family. At the end of that day when I decided to proceed with MA, God knows I would have wanted another child if we only have the means and capacity.
I'm not sure why I'm even explaining here. It's part guilt, part denial din siguro. And grief.
Let's be more responsible as adults, as parents. This secret/hidden and unsupported medical abortion especially in our country, is very dangerous and subject to criminal liabilities. I'm not saying it's OK to do kung nasa ibang bansa tayo. I'm saying if we could be more aware and responsible, we can avoid this very taxing, emotionally draining process and we wouldn't have to do this to our babies.
Lastly, thank you Ms Ella for the risks you take to make this available here. Salamat din sa advise at support.
This post officially marks the end of this pregnancy for me.
Take care, everyone.